Finding the courage to be true to yourself - Hamsa

When I was three they said I was wilful.

When I was thirteen they said I was unpredictable.

At twenty five they thought I should settle down.

At forty they thought my spontaneous nature was a flaw.

…and so here I am after a spiritual apprenticeship and dedication that spans well over a decade,

with the strength of heart, loyalty and connection to my inner guru, no matter how tough the path became

and the softness of my careful steps.

It is only today that I realise all those things that people saw in me, things that made me fundamentally who I am,

that they only saw as faults or something to change or fix.

Only now do I realise those things have been and are my gifts and my uniqueness.

The strength of mind to be true to one’s inner knowing for half a life.

The subtle listening to the flow of life, her heart beat.

To move with the flow, no matter how that may seem to the onlooker.

The love and care I show myself and in giving myself all that I need.

The joy and spontaneous inspiration that pops out of me, whenever I feel it flow forward.

The rattling of the cage of humanity whenever the Shakti of power moves through me

And my willingness to accept the shape that takes.

The trust I give to my expansion and retraction.

Now they say I am an inspirer of men.

Now they see my pioneering spirit

Now they know I can still feel that I am stardust.

But…when I am eighty they will say I am wilful.

When I am ninety five they will say I am unpredictable.

And when I’m done I will settle down and die,

probably in the most unpredictable way.

This is my shape and I love the wilderness within my being,

the way she looks at the world,

the way she loves.

Even her veiledness so that others do not see her or misunderstand how she moves.

For this is the reflection of the great mystery in me.

For this is the protection of the child of the stars.

For this is the realisation that I am all those things.